Surprise no. 1:
The Prodigy, as I've aptly nicknamed her, is the kind of firstborn child that hasn't been schooled the meaning of sshhh". She's overly energetic and unapologetically loud. She deems personal space a laughable concept (no, really!). Her character and my own may be on either side of the spectrum but now, strangely enough, my "hermit-ism" of the past feels very much humdrum.
And just when I thought I was getting the hang of running after The Prodigy and making sure she doesn't burn, cut or maime herself, here comes The Progeny, the quiet one that likes to sleep alot.
Surprise no. 2:
(Side note: Why the names, you ask? I figured a grandiose name blesses a child; so rather than wait and see whether greatness will eventually find them, I propose bringing greatness to them, you feel me?)
Time fellas! That's all it takes. Bless @jerimasala for being so patient with me as I warmed up to being indeed "child-safe". It took time to get over the noise. It took time to get used to erratic sleeping patterns. It took time from work to just sit outside and play with kokoto and sticks. But, it is a choice I made. The line between responsibility and active fatherhood is a vast one. Providing diapers is not the same as digging holes in the sand for 2 hours with your child. No father should miss bathing his child or miss the first time his child is able to peel a banana on their own (it took The Prodigy a minute). With one child, you can atleast leave them with their mother for a time while you, you know, go off to do manly things.
And just when I thought I was getting the hang of running after The Prodigy and making sure she doesn't burn, cut or maime herself, here comes The Progeny, the quiet one that likes to sleep alot.
Surprise no. 2:
(Side note: Why the names, you ask? I figured a grandiose name blesses a child; so rather than wait and see whether greatness will eventually find them, I propose bringing greatness to them, you feel me?)
Time fellas! That's all it takes. Bless @jerimasala for being so patient with me as I warmed up to being indeed "child-safe". It took time to get over the noise. It took time to get used to erratic sleeping patterns. It took time from work to just sit outside and play with kokoto and sticks. But, it is a choice I made. The line between responsibility and active fatherhood is a vast one. Providing diapers is not the same as digging holes in the sand for 2 hours with your child. No father should miss bathing his child or miss the first time his child is able to peel a banana on their own (it took The Prodigy a minute). With one child, you can atleast leave them with their mother for a time while you, you know, go off to do manly things.
I work from home as a freelance designer/writer, and in between writer's block and/or creative meltdowns, I help with the basic nannying duties most of you men would otherwise pay someone to do for you. More than just being around my kids, I want to see them grow; to mold them and guide them towards whatever path their lives have set for them.
So maybe it's as simple as this: Rather than give a child what I may think they want, I'll give them my time.
In the blogging circle, I go by the name Chef Fatuma but people also
know me by my slave name Mark Muchura :-) A freelance designer/writer and part time ninja by circumstantial trade, I regard my business more to do with raising 2 daughters.
It does take time. In fact, I feel that one of the most precious things that I can give my son is time -- time to love, time to grow, time for us to make precious memories.
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing better than giving childre time. At the end of the day...that's all we have as individuals especially when you are a parent! Good message!
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